1. |
I'm a Watermelon
03:06
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I'M A WATERMELON
I'm a watermelon
Sailing through the breeze
I can feel it in my rinds
I can feel it in my seeds
Oh yeah
He's a watermelon and he's sailin' like Magellan
And he feels a lot of things
A lot of things
A lot of things
I'm a watermelon
Soaring coast to coast
I can feel you in my mind
I can eat you in my toast
Oh yeah
He's a watermelon and he's sailin' like Magellan
And he feels a lot of things
A lot of things
A lot of things
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2. |
Fat Shannon
03:17
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FAT SHANNON
Shannon was a fat kid
Shaped like a tuna can
He'd do nothin' more than just scream
He'd be on the playground
Writhing like a worm and
All the kids would stare and they'd sing,
"What does it mean to be Fat Shannon?
"What, Oh! what does it mean?
"Fat Shannon?
"Fat Shannon?
"Fat Shannon O where did you go?"
One day Shannon screamed and
The windows started breaking and
Ears were exploding and the teacher had died
Shannon was okay but
He decided it wasn't
Exactly what he wanted so he cried
The kids sang, "What is your deal? Come on, Fat Shannon! What
"What do you want from us?
"Fat Shannon?
"Fat Shannon?
"Fat Shannon O where did you go?"
And you know what he did next? I'll tell you:
He pooped on the rug,
He pooped on the rug,
He pooped on the rug!
Fat Shannon, stop screaming
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3. |
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THE THIRSTY TREK OF TERRANCE TITTLEBAUM
Ah...man...
...Oh boy...
Mmmboy is it hot,
OoOhoh it's hot!
There's sweat all over me...
Sweat in my toes,
My armpits, and my
Lower BACK,
The back of my knees, and...
...Oahaoh man...
So much damn SWEAT
Where's all this sweat coming from??
I smell like month-old beef franks!
Ugh...
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4. |
Fingers, the Clown
02:34
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FINGERS, THE CLOWN
Arriving at noon
On his colored balloon,
Fingers, the Clown has come back
Wearing his favorite tshirt,
Covered in butter and dirt,
Fingers the Clown has returned
Bringing with him some gold,
Toothpaste and mold,
Fingers the Clown brings us wealth
Nothing on his feet,
Everyone crowding the streets,
Fingers the Clown has come back
(For us)
Fingers
Fingers
Fingers
Fingers (the Clown)
Humbibbybum badum badiddy bumbum
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5. |
Jimmy, Carter
01:12
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JIMMY, CARTER
"That squirrel, it just leaped...
Like a dolphin
...Off the roof..."
Huehhhhhhhhh
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6. |
Burrito Man
01:47
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BURRITO MAN
Burrito Boy was a handsome lad,
Rejected by his mom and dad
Full of beef, rice, and beans
Soaked in his tortilla jeans--
OH HELL YEAH!
You're such a rebel, Burrito Boy!
You're just better than everyone else!
Look at you go!
Look at you go, Burrito Boy!
Ahh...
Burrito Boy left his home,
Livin' like a nomadic gnome
He looked at his life as a grain of sand,
And he became a Burrito Man!--
SEXY! SEXY BURRITO MAN!
We love you Burrito Man!
You're just drippin' sauce and love!
Oh, Burrito Man!
Look at you go now!
You're just flutterin' in the breeze with your tortilla and your cheese!
Burrito Boy -> Burrito MAN!
And it was from that point on
Burrito man
Decided to live his life
Like a full entree,
And that's when
He knew
He was a Burrito Man
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7. |
Living & Believing
01:47
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LIVING & BELIEVING
I'm living in a house that is not mine
I'm wearing clothes that do not belong to me
I'M LIVING IN A HOUSE THAT IS NOT MINE!
I'M WEARING CLOTHES THAT DO NOT BELONG TO ME!
I love to sleep
And I love to eat...
...
I don't believe in
Washing underwear
I don't believe in
Washing my underwear
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8. |
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9. |
Uncle Vegas
02:48
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UNCLE VEGAS
Uncle Vegas, it's time to go
Put your shorts on, get out of the pool
Leave the vodka, leave the cheese
Your fluttering nipples in the breeze
Uncle Vegas,
You're always burping
God, you'd think you were a blimp!
Oh no, but you're just Uncle Vegas
Uncle Vegas, you sold your house
You bought some tacos and a smaller house
You bathe in butter, you bathe in grease
Your nipples they're fluttering in the breeze
Uncle Vegas,
Don't bet your kids
You're not rich in friends, and your car is a sandwich,
But you're Uncle Vegas
Uncle Vegas
Stop lifting that boy above your shoulders
He's not what you think, he's just a boy
And you're Uncle Vegas
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10. |
Watermelon (Reprise)
08:15
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Johnny Thursday Boston, Massachusetts
Johnny Thursday parted from the primordial ooze of love when he was but a boy. Now, he writes folk songs that defile expectations.
Someday, he will die.
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